Quite amazing really. My Mum, in the Chinese restaurant pic, reminded me of these pictures that I had stored on my work PC not the Mac where I do all my blog and Facebook from. 

These photos are from their trip in November. Placing these on is a very sad one for me, as we look so happy like any normal family. The blond guy is my brother DK.

It's just sad to see such happy smily faces of all our family and know that Ni will never be in another family photo with us. So sad. She lights up every photo I have, and indeed the room she was in. 

More counselling for me tomorrow, it's reaching the much needed stage - I have to admit i was supposed to go Friday but dropped out at the last minute. I couldn't face it. But tomorrow I will be there absolutely. 

Thanks for reminding me of these pics Mum - some lovely family shots of us all. Lovely. See you even tried the chopsticks. Well done Mr Kennett jnr for being able to use them, well done Oliver.

Many have asked including counsellours and friends when did Ni and I first meet. Well everyone here it is - the infamous 1st encounter. As you can see Nina was as usual absolutely beautiful, and very sexy in this little number. Yes the guy withe huge affro is indeed me. This was our very good friends 30th party at her parents old house in Margate - a leaving house do and 70's night.

The funny thing was I spoke to Ni's a lot that night, we all danced, drank and had such fun together. I had to go back the next day to Barbara's to collect something I had left and Ni actually answered the door as she was staying with Barbara. "Hello Ni, how are you this morning?" I said. She said ................................"Sorry who are you?" Ha Ha, funny funny. Yep because of my great fancy dress she had absolutely NO idea it was me. Bless her.

So there you have it, the first meeting between Nina and Brian Kennett. It wouldn't be until about 5 years later though that we had out first couple experience. But perhaps that's not good for the blog - ha ha. Also at Barbara's strangely enough.

Sometimes you have good days, and today was good. 

Check out baby Amy for one of her first stands, very proud of her. She will 100% be walking before she is one I think, just a shame her mum is not here to see all this happening. She is such a beautiful little thing, and you can tell actually she is very proud of herself let alone we all being the same.

Ollie is being amazingly good, Miss Atima told me today he was doing really well at school. Good boy Ollie. We looked through some of Nina's photos today before he went to bed, we both got a little upset, but we played a video clip or two and it was lovely to hear her voice.

Ollie is doing from the field to the table at school, learning where foods come from and the like. So I had my first oliver sandwich made for me at the weekend, thanks Ollie it was Yummy!!! More please.

I am back to work, it's official. Very very busy working on only one client based in Singapore and Malaysia. Still not sleeping very well and probably drinking and smoking far too much for my own good, but I know it'll get better soon. I owe it to the kids who have been supporting me so much the past weeks. 

Well that's the update for today, very proud of Amy, you saw it here first her first standing, 17th March 2009. Bless!!!!!!

Yet again my lovely boy Oliver has amazed me. I was speaking (via SMS) to his teacher, Miss Atima, to make sure all was OK with him at school and with his homework. He has a disco tonight so wanted to make sure he was OK.

I receive the following back from Atima, which has just made me smile, thank you so much Ollie. 

"He's doing fine. Don't worry. He's a great guy. We were reading about fruit and nuts, when we heard thunder and he said maybe it's my Mum breaking nuts in the sky. Or she's getting cross at someone up there. He's just great."

Daddy is so very proud and loves you so very much, and Mummy and Amy do absolutely as well.

Yesterday was an interesting day for me, as it was the first business trip I have had to do away from the kids since Ni left us. Bit of a panicky couple of days, but actually Ollie and Amy were fine. Usual thing though of something happening when I was away the fridge packed up and defrosted a load of food of ours, typical. But pails in to insignificance compared to last time.

I have continued the counselling and saw Dr Perera this week. Talked a lot and went through Nina photos so very emotional, but great to talk about her from the very first time we met - at Barbaras 70's house leaving do in Westbrook. Trying to find the photos of Brownie and me, as were were blacked up with affros etc. I had to go back the next day to get something and Ni was there still. Yes hello can I help, er it's me Kenno - she had no idea because of the fancy dress. Bless! My first time with Ni.

2 friends also announced this week that they are to marry soon. Great news for them, delighted in fact. So Goffy and Jeremy will be marrying in 2009 - they even said that perhaps Nina helped with that "push" to do it as you never know what is around the corner. Sp Goffy in UK and Jeremy now lives here in Singapore - but is to marry in Phuket Thailand and then be there Xmas day. I think I will be going to this wedding as even the counsellour said be cautious at main events and try to do something different - so what better than Xmas in Phuket??? So the photo above is the last time we went to Phuket with only Oliver at the time of course as we flew from Australia. Now we're 50 minutes away in SIngapore.

Take care all, with much love from Bri, Amy and Ollie

 I have to say this one took some doing. Very emotional experience creating this, and I just hope it does the lovely girl justice, because she truly is just so beautiful. These are some of my favourite photos and moments from trips or just fun with friends. She looks amazing as will be the way I and I think all will remember her.

Beautiful Nina. Love you gorgeous always, Bri xxx

   Sorry for the crazy video clip. This is one that makes me and Ollie laugh, and is important for us, and I am hoping for you all too as Ollie and I have sat and said "we don't want to forget what Mummy's voice sounds like". So we use this one as a reminder and because it makes us laugh too.

I thought also in this I would advise you all that I made a decision when people were asking re where to send flowers and asked that the monies they would use for that actually be channeled to a charity. So Nina has caused nearly 2,000 USD to be raised for a Breast Cancer Charity in Asia, it's a support group that literally supports the poor families that have to go through treatment. So it's an amazing cause and I know she would be proud that she has helped indirectly. We were talking about this together so I know she would approve, as a friend of mine had to use the support himself when his lovely wife, Alice, was diagnosed. Well she is treated now and on the road to recovery which is the best news.

Well a short one for today. It's been a busy week as I have gone back to work, Ollie is at school, Mary is embedded in the family now, my Mum flies home Firday and Nina's Mum joins us same day, I passed my Singaporean driving test (very important), we're moving condos on 18th April latest, I am having baby first aid course today etc. Very very busy!!!! Love to you all Bri, Amy and Ollie xxx

One of the last photos I have of the lovely Ni's, on our trip to Melacca in Malaysia with our dear friends here - sorry Kirsty you didn't get in the photo. Remember I was trying the new camera stand Lol lent me.

Well today was a different one for me as I had my first counselling session since the lovely girl left us. Quite amazing actually as my Ni was always talking about counselling, but me with my stiff upper lip always rejected it. Well she finally got me there today.

I had 50 minutes of what the f*ck am I doing here to then the last 20 minutes of amazing release, the best since losing Ni's. Truly amazing as since Nina left I have spoken to so so many people that all knew her and loved her so well - and of course you talk about their experience and their love and their sadness and you sort of just update on the status of you and the kids - almost numb to pain as you probably have said the same thing many times that day. Firstly let me apologise to all that read this. 

But the counsellor after 50 minutes asked me 2 or 3 really basic questions - "so tell me when you met Nina?", "what did you love about her?", "what was she like?" - I have not even thought, or spoken of these things since she died, because all conversations are with our friends and family that know us so so well. I cried my eyes out and felt such pain and pressure release to remember her for why I did love her so much, something that will never disappear. My next session is with special photos of her.

It's now 2 weeks since I lost my beautiful Nina. We are holding in there, each day has ups and downs and fond memories. We all miss her terribly. Oliver is back to school and is being such a mature and brave child. Amy, well Amy is just the cute lovely 9 month old - cuddle her and she is happy. 

As this blog develops I hope you can all post a picture or two and any thoughts about their mum that they can read when they're ready or want to know more about her. So please share this with those that knew the lovely girl and please contribute to enable me to share Ni with the kids as they grow. With love Brian, Amy and Ollie