One of the last photos I have of the lovely Ni's, on our trip to Melacca in Malaysia with our dear friends here - sorry Kirsty you didn't get in the photo. Remember I was trying the new camera stand Lol lent me.Well today was a different one for me as I had my first counselling session since the lovely girl left us. Quite amazing actually as my Ni was always talking about counselling, but me with my stiff upper lip always rejected it. Well she finally got me there today.
I had 50 minutes of what the f*ck am I doing here to then the last 20 minutes of amazing release, the best since losing Ni's. Truly amazing as since Nina left I have spoken to so so many people that all knew her and loved her so well - and of course you talk about their experience and their love and their sadness and you sort of just update on the status of you and the kids - almost numb to pain as you probably have said the same thing many times that day. Firstly let me apologise to all that read this.
But the counsellor after 50 minutes asked me 2 or 3 really basic questions - "so tell me when you met Nina?", "what did you love about her?", "what was she like?" - I have not even thought, or spoken of these things since she died, because all conversations are with our friends and family that know us so so well. I cried my eyes out and felt such pain and pressure release to remember her for why I did love her so much, something that will never disappear. My next session is with special photos of her.
After our conversation it was a really big day for you today mate....and the liitle man too.....poor little guy....can i say how brave he is being.....made of stong stuff eh...lets hope the docs are just being over cautious.
ReplyDeleteSooo pleased your counselling session went well mate and you have some release...therapy comes in many ways...keep it up if it helps matey :o)
Ailsa and I were reading this together and we too thought when did you actually meet? We know when you got together...we think after Amelia's christening party at our old place in Northdown Park Rd or was it one of my birthday doos?
One thing we do know is that her love is strong..it must be to be with you mate and to follow you around the world LOL..not many would have taken on that challenge!
A beautiful gorgeous girl.....we miss.
David xxx
You and Nina visited New York (from UK) together in Dec of 2000, and this was shortly after you began dating, I believe. You were staying at the Royalton Hotel, I went to visit you two and met you for the first time, sometime in the morning. You were both amazed at how much static shock you were getting because it's so dry in NY, we walked a few blocks to get Chinese noodles at Ollie's (wow the name seems now coincidental) and during this walk you both gave each other about 15 of them, what with wearing thick coats - love sparkles?
ReplyDeleteAfter a few days' stay there I think you went off to a business trip? while Nina stayed with me for a few more days up in Hartsdale where I live, about 1 hr away from NYC. While we spent time together she told me Brian was the person she would want to be married to one day and hoped that he was thinking the same too. I remember her nodding to herself like she had done since she was a little girl, like when she was convinced she liked something for sure (usually a food item)!